Bob Hartley, School Psychologist
by LisaDouglas
Summary: When Bob has a lull in patients and the school psychologist has to take a leave of absence, Emily invites Bob to replace him.


Chapter One- Banana Mush and Fiddle Faddle

The school psychologist had in fact, gone mad. It was Peter Henderson, the sixth grade's most trying student, and the last food fight he'd instigated that had done it… that damn banana mush. But of course, the official explanation was merely that he'd not taken enough vacation time in the past few years and had been sent to Hawaii for some much needed rest and relaxation. In reality, he was in a gloomy Chicago hospital wearing a straight jacket and being force-fed hunks of half crushed banana bits. The mush in the bowl before him, much like the bits of banana that had been smeared all over the cafeteria walls and floors…reminded him of his elderly great Aunt who'd lost her senses when he was very young and had to eat pre-chewed food. Those images had always haunted him, and so unbeknownst to anyone around him, his hospital diet was only driving him further into the depths of lunacy.

Emily Hartley stepped outside the hospital and deployed her black umbrella. It was just a short walk from the apartment and she was headed home. She hadn't seen Mr. Hecht, the school psychologist since it happened, and was floored at his state: he was a mess. She knew she had to replace him, at least temporarily and she was burdened by it. Technically it wasn't even her job; it was the principal's. But, he was on a fishing trip, once again, leaving the hard work up to her.

She had a good idea, one that would kill a few birds with one stone…she just wasn't sure she could do this to her husband. She didn't think, despite being a psychologist, that Bob really knew how to deal with children…or that he liked them much. They didn't have any, he didn't treat them, and baby-sitting Howie Borden usually annoyed him more than anything else she could think of…should she even ask? Oh, but she had to ask.

"Hi honey." Bob greeted when she got home.

It was early afternoon on a Wednesday; the rain outside was slowly turning into slushy snow. Bob was at home on the couch in his robe watching television and eating Fiddle Faddle, a cheap discount store snack, somewhat similar to Cracker Jack. Mr. Carlin had brought Bob 15 boxes when he was addicted to them, back when he was afraid to eat food that didn't come from a gas station's convenience store.

Bob had been home for several days due to a lull in his appointments; having temporarily cured many people like Mr. Carlin from inane fears they conjured up in flights of their own fancy. Now he was kind of depressed, but wouldn't admit it. He silently wondered if he and his patients were co-dependent on each other now, if their misery equaled his happiness and peace of mind and if that was wrong. But instead or talking about it, he was indulging in the cheap caramel covered snack. It, after all, had helped Carlin, the Real Estate tycoon through his troubles well enough.

"Hi." Emily said, shutting the door behind her and quickly beginning to remove her coat. He could tell she was burdened when she spoke.

"How was, how was Mr. Hecht?" He asked, turning slightly to watch as she began to work on her boots now. She could hear that he still had fiddle faddle in his mouth.

"Oh a mess Bob, I don't know what I'm going to do."

"About what?" He inquired.

"Well, the thing is, he's going to need some recovery time, and that's fine but…we really need a sub."

"Well call a sub." He didn't see what the problem was.

"Bob, you can't just call a substitute psychologist, like you can call a substitute teacher."

"Oh." He said.

"And I was thinking…I know you're kind of, kind of having a lull in your appointments and I was wondering if you maybe, could fill in for a while?"

"Me?" He couldn't believe she'd asked. She sat on the edge of the couch next to him now.

"Yeah. Now honey, I know kids aren't exactly you're forte, but this is an important job and I need someone I trust…and besides, if you're at school with me, it means we'll get to spend some more time together, and honestly Bob, I can't think of any better perk to this than, than that." She giggled, inching closer to him flirtatiously, almost as if she were going to kiss him.

"I can Emily."

"You can?" She was shocked and a little hurt, she thought surely that would be appealing to him. She pulled back from him and blinked a few times.

"Yes." He said, leaning forward again to kiss her lips. She pulled back.

"Ah, not with fiddle faddle breath you don't." She teased, kissing his cheek. He smiled, as she got up to and make dinner, finding this fair enough.

Bob was nervous. Sure he was excited to be with Emily, thankful for the distraction from the practice he was worried was falling apart…but he also didn't know what to do with kids, especially troubled ones. He didn't like them much in the first place. Would they put him in Mr. Hect's shoes?


End file.
